Book Review: Finding It By Cora Carmack

Kelsey summers is a girl running away from her past that haunts her, getting further away from the person she used to be.
No longer being able to deal with her life at home she goes travelling around Europe meeting random guys, drinking to oblivion to block out the trauma of her childhood. But it doesn't matter how far you go the past and problems you are running away from follow you were every you go.

Kelsey's plan was to have as many amazing experience and stories that she could then go home and remember her time travelling whilst she would lead a miserable life her parents had planned for her.
what she didn't plan for was meeting a guy on a very embarrassing night, that he would make her want to be the person she used to be and make her find a home that she hadn't had since leaving her university friends.

Jackson is her night in shining Amer, they are both falling for each other but though they want each other they are both very guarded keeping secrets that they haven't told each other stopping them being able to completely be all in.

One night they finally give into their desires still holding back but it unlocks Kelsey's past and she tells Jackson what happened and why she is running away. Kelsey suspects Jackson hasn't told her everything then one phone call tells her everything she needs to no her heart breaks, what she thought was finally real was all lies and she cant get over it but it makes her face her own past so she can move forward.

This was a lovely read, it showed how carrying your past with you can ruin your future, that you have to deal with something not run away from it to have any peace with yourself.
it just shows when you aren't looking you may find the one, it can change your world and make you see things completely different when you let another person into your sole and see the real you no matter how broken you are you can heal love and be loved don't let your past dictate your future.

Peanut xx

Book Review: Fractured By Dani Atkins

Fractured one woman two lives one ending.


Fractured is a book about a character called Rachel, she wakes up after collapsing in a church yard late at night to a new world where nothing makes sense to her, the life she thought she had lead for the past 5 years wasn't the life she woke up to.

The world Rachel knew was that an accident that took place when her and her friends were celebrating their friendship and that they were about to embark on a new chapter in their lives going their separate ways to university took the life of her best friend jimmy and she was never the same again.

Since the accident the life Rachel new 5 years later was the scars on her face, her dad having lung cancer and he life being pretty grim it wasn't the life she had wanted for herself it was the far from that, she had no life though jimmy saved her life that day ending his her life ended that day too.

Back in the home town that haunts her for her friends Sarah's wedding all together for the first time Rachel goes to Jimmy's grave she always wondered what jimmy wanted to say to her at that fateful meal so egar to see her tell her something that was never to be said.

Rachel collapsed at the grave waking up to this new and improved life not only was her father healthy no Cancer but the boy she had missed that had saved her life was alive this man now stood in front of her she couldn't believe her eyes her best friend who she never got over was here alive.

Through out the story Rachel is caught in this bizard world wanting her old life back because that's what was her life, the life she new but the new life she woke up to was oh so much better, it was the life she had always wanted but she didn't want it now as it was strange unsettling to her.

As  the reader your trying to figure out which is her real life not knowing what to believe yourself. it is a twister of a story that pulls at your heart and really hard to put down I would definitely recommend this book.

Peanut xx

Book Review:The Fault In Our Stars By John Green

First a bit about my reading back ground

When it comes to books I'm not your typical book worm, I wasn't the child that always had my nose in a book, though I looked as If I would with my big pink glasses but no that wasn't me.
I have never been a fan of reading, I was a slow reader when I was growing up not stupid slow but took my time to read what I was reading. I hated reading out loud when the teacher would say "Laura can you please read the next age to the class" I would politely decline.
It completely turned me off reading altogether, I'm ashamed to say I cant remember a single book I have read as a child other than university books I haven't read a book in 15 years I know shocking.

It wasn't until a couple of months ago that I started to read, only because my laptop ran out of battery and I had no other technology to use as I had builders in my house doing work. I picked up a book my mum had been reading written by James Patterson, my mum is the typical book worm always reading I never understood why as I always thought its so boring and you should just watch a movie.

That day of not being able to use technology changed my life it opened my world up to, characters that touched my heart that made me angry and made me see life in a different way it opened me up to a exciting new world that adventures are boundless.

my review

When a book is so hyped up you don't think it can live up to what you think it will be, but this book will rip your heart out and feeling like its being stomped on by Issac like the trophies in the book.
Gus and Hazel are weird, quirky, intellectual, talk like no other teenager you will have ever met, who meet in the most extra ordinary way in a support group who love nothing more than to play video games where he can save her and talk about a book and the universe and what life means who have cancer but they draw you into the book.
you fall in love with them both and hoping and wishing they could have the happy ending, but in a way they do.

Though their lives are cut short they have the most amazing few months together, its the best thing that happened to hazel when her mother makes her go to the support group she finds the love of her life loses her virginity and has a wonderful romantic dream trip to Amsterdam.
Its nice to see in a book that a young couple in love aren't shown in a childish way, it is the real know matter your age you will want to find this kind of love I know I do, I want to find my Gus that will leave his scar on me and wouldn't mind me leaving mine on him.
Though they are dying of cancer its not completely depressing, it doesn't depict the cancer as this evil thing it just sucks to have that its just life shit happens and you have to roll with what you have got in life they make the most of the precious time they have together.

Its sad to say I'm jealous of these characters yes their lives are short they didn't get to have many years together to have children  themselves but the fact they found a love that is real, makes your stomach have butterflies your heart skip a beat when she saw his crooked smile and amazing adventure in Amsterdam some don't find that when they live to 100, so in that way they are lucky.

What I learnt from this book is that's life cruel the universe doesn't owe us anything the day we are born we are not granted so many years and then that's your lot, we aren't granted the next breath so be grateful for what you get and chose those who can leave a scar on you wisely.

If you want to cry, laugh, fall in love with amazing characters, see life from a different perspective read this it will get you thinking and seeing things in a different way, I was sad to finish this book and say good bye to

Book Review: The Story Of Us By Dani Atkins

The story of us is a beautifully written tug of the heart love triangle book based on the lead female character Emma Marshall, who's life is turned upside down when she is involved in a car accident on the night of her hen do, with her two best childhood friends Amy and Caro (Caroline).

She was set to marry her childhood sweet heart Richard until on the night of the accident when a dark hair, tanned American man called Jack Monroe saved he. After the event nothing was ever the same again.
Before the accident Amy was feeling sick so unbuckled her seat belt to throw up when the impact happened she was flung threw the windscreen leaving disastrous inflictions which she never recovered from.
Caro was OK physically but mentally she wasn't the same for a long time she used to be the strong one but blamed herself for the accident as she was driving. it wasn't her fault, in fact if she didn't get out of the car that was stuck in the cavernous ditch then Jack wouldn't have stopped and saved Emma, and she was the one who found Amy giving her that little bit of hope she will be OK but sadly that wasn't to be.

When someone saves your life you have this connection with them with Emma and Jack they had this force that pulled them like a stretchy cord bringing them back together. on the night of the accident Jack was calming, had  good banter with Emma even in the not so great circumstances. he was strong pulling Emma's legs from under the cars seat after they got wedged my the metal bars cutting his own arm as he did it.  he stayed with her in the hospital until Richard got there he wasn't happy with this new American guy even though he did save Emma's life, jealousy struck and a little I  wish I had saved my wife to be.

They got the news that Amy had passed away Emma distraught but too numb to show it until Jack came back to the hospital  after hearing Amy hadn't  made it, she broke down in those strong arms that he had earlier in the night had saved her life.

Emma had moved away when she was 18 to go to university,  then working in London and Washington USA, she loved her marketing job and though she came back to help her mum who is sick she just stepped back into her old 18 year old self life. she was working in the book shop she did in high school dating her old school sweet heart now set to marry him, this accident questioned what she really wanted.

After a hard day visiting Amy's parents and going threw her apartment to look for funereal clothes she found a beautiful dress in the pocket was a number of Richards work, she thought nothing of it as she had previously tried to set her put with one of  Richards work friends. after a long emotional day she arrived home to beautiful flowers she thought were from Richard but were from jack for condolence of Amy, obviously Richard wasn't happy that Jack was still contacting Emma but it put a smile on Emma's face that he sent them.

The day arrived to say good bye to Amy, Richard who was never one to show emotions was hit hard by Amy's death, he couldn't hold it together and then as Emma looked around to see all those who came to pay their respects the dark haired American was stood at the back of the church. after the service Emma thanked him not thinking she would see him there but he had bumped into Caro and she had mentioned it to him. she was always happy to see him and had a lump in her throat when she talked to him, she could never repay him for saving her life she didn't know if the connection they had was one of gratitude and the fact he saved her life she read all about relationships with people who saved your life and  it was normal to feel a connection or if she truly liked him.

As Richard wasn't dealing with Amy's death Emma told him to go on a school trip skiing, Emma went back to work with her kooky French boss Monique the only person In her life who didn't think she and Richard belonged together. Emma was busy working and had an unexpected visitor in came her handsome Jack Monroe. he had been staying in the UK to do research for a thriller book he was writing and wanted a book on lakes. Emma found him one and he offered to take her to lunch, even though he'd already done enough by saving her life he was eager to spend more time in her company.

He and Emma went of town to stop tongues wagging, she and Richard had postponed their wedding out of respect and didn't want people asking who this stranger she was with when she was meant to be getting married. she got on so well  Jack if grazed her arm Emma would get butterflies he made her feel a way no one had ever done before.
On the drive back Emma noticed Jack had a pile of books on the back seat of the car, he had gone to the 3 other book stores looking for her when after she told him at the hospital she worked in one buying the same book. Emma made him laugh with her comment that why didn't he just buy a different book? Jack loved Emma's sense of humour none had made him laugh like she made him in a long time.

They arrange to meet up again as he wanted to go to a lake that was in one of the books to do some research. they were talking and he didn't understand one thing about what Amy said that night on the dark tarmac road, when Amy said I'm sorry Emma and thank you for forgiving me. later as Emma was re-running what he had said about that night things started to click into place Amy was having an affair with Richard there was the number in her dress her saying sorry there was just something in the pit of her stomach.
Contacting Caro to see if she new anything of her best friends betrayal they had talked before in a round about way and Emma could tell she was hiding something, so when she asked her out right and she said she didn't no but had suspected Emma felt betrayed by her other best friend. Caro didn't want to tell her as she new she would be heartbroken but she didn't have any evidence either so decided to let it lye.

Unable to talk to Caro Emma remembered the where abouts of Jack's rental home, though not the exact house but it didn't take her long to find it was a small place after all. Jack hadn't opened up about his life, he was always playing his cards close to his chest you could tell he was holding something  back. Emma was then surprised when he told her that his ex wife cheated on him with his best friend he hadn't been in a committed relationship in the following years to scared to get hurt. he told her you don't have enough proof let him explain so the next day when Richard returned from skiing she took him to a secluded place and asked him he confessed straight away she threw his ring and left him.

Caro had a massive break down Richard called Emma who ignored his calls until she new it was about her, she was sobbing clutching Amy's head stone wanting to planting flowers Emma felt bad that she pushed her friend away she knew it wasn't her fault she didn't tell her she didn't no for sure and she was protecting her after that day she began to rebuild her life.

Arranging to go to the lake again even though he could find it by himself he asked Emma he  had told her of his feelings for her but wouldn't do anything about them as he new that no matter what had happened with Richard she still believe in happy ever after, marriage and having children which for him wasn't an option after he was so badly hurt. they stopped off At a local pub sat next to an in love old married couple, Emma couldn't stop feeling the way she did about Jack but she knew it didn't matter what she said he wouldn't change his feelings.
after dinner they took a walk around the back of the pub that felt so sucluded that with the trees moving in the breeze, it lead to a old bridge with out either saying they walked to the middle taking in the moment of being with him and the beautiful surroundings,  before she new it Jack was in front of her with his lips on hers Emma had wanted this for so long jack pulled away it thought it was the wrong thing to do as he new Emma had fallen for him and he her but they just wanted totally different things out of life and each other.
It was an awkward ride home Emma pretending to sleep Jack going along with it was this really going to be their stories ending.

a few days later Emma had an unexpected phone call she didn't expect to get a call from him asking her if toad in the whole had actual toad in it as he was fasincated with the names we britsh give to our food. she said no jack it isn't a toad it was also his really bad way of getting to see her again so he leaped at the chance to see her when she offered to cook it for him.
she turned up at his door the following Saturday ingredients in hand not knowing what to expect was he going to mention the kiss? he answers the door but was in the middle of skyping someone, though jack had mentioned his ex wife he didn't say much else of the life he lead in america, Emma had asked a number of times for him to extend his visit but had always said he couldn't because of his commitments but would say what they were.
emma over heard his conversation ok she was ease dropping trying to get to see who he was talking to the way he spoke was with love she automatically thought he had a woman he loved waiting for him to get back she tried to leave but he spotted her so she went back to  the kitchen and pretended to un pack the bags of food she brought.
He later tells an angry Emma that he was speaking to his daughter who his ex didn't tell him existed till she was 7 shes 10 now she gave her to her sister and brother in law and only told him she had her because she wanted money.
he managed rebuild a relationship with his daughter talking so fondly and lovingly about her it all started to make sense to Emma now why he was so reluctant to settle down why he couldn't stay and be with her.

They wet for a walk on the beach he never let her hand go until they walked up the slippery steps as she walked behind him she slipped bruising her bum he wanted to see the damage but she wasn't having it, he told her to have a shower to help with the bruising and so she could see the damage her self with out him having a peek. all she could think of was jack whilst in the shower she used his shower gel that smelt of him. coming out he asked how it looked so as he was so interested she finally gave in pulling just a little bit of her jeans down and her top up showing just a little of her hip he slowly brought her jeans and the top of her lace underwear down Emma not stopping him he moved his hands softly over her bruise and around her hip turning her to face him. this was a moment they had both been waiting for he kissed her neck then her lips but they he came to a steady stop the heat was cooling down and he said he couldn't do it he couldn't make love to her knowing he was leaving not just for emma but for him self too.

emma drove away crying and hurt she got half way down the road in the pouring down rain and realised shes not letting him go she has to tell him how she feels, as she drove down his drive she could see him in his car he was on his way to find her neither of them wanted to let each other go they ran into each others arms and went into the house and made love all night.
in the moring needing food before they started all over again jack said they can make it work coming back every 3 months but he could see emma didn't want a long distance thing but she could go with him as she had her mother to think of but they were determined to make it work.
they started to get intmate on the kitchen table when they were interrupted it was Richard emmas mother had gone missing and he needed to find her so Caro told him where she would be, he was crushed to seethe woman he loved with the guy that saved her life and now taken her heart away from him.
Emma's mum had gone missing again the police starting a search party in the woods were she liked to walk. since she had Alzheimer's she could be anywhere, they all went off in search thankfully she was found she had gone in search of Emma's engagement ring the one she threw away thinking it would make Emma happy but it just broke her heart that he mum went missing for her. seeing Emma was with her family and Richard jack left and didn't phone which frustrated Emma leaving him message after message getting nothing in return. Richard and Emma had fallen asleep on separate sofas when jack knocked on the door early the next morning Richard made it out they had slept together which angered Emma even more.
With only having a few days left till he went back to America jack was going To be in London for a couple nights with Emma joining him until the insistent with her mother she could no longer go jack left and she new she would never see him again from the look he gave her when he saw Richard there he must of  believed what he over heard Caro said that she slept with jack to get Richard jealous which couldn't be further from the truth. Caro just said that as she thought it was an infatuation not love and thought if Emma slept with him she would be on exclude footing to Richard cheating and then she would be able to love Richard again but her heart wasn't with  Richard it was with jack.

Everyone in her life loved Richard after reading a letter Amy's mother gave her  a few weeks earlier new it wasn't a planned thing between her best friend and fiance Amy was in love with Richard and for Richard it was a moment of madness he wouldn't never be able to make right.
she went to Amy's grave and made her peace with her she loved her and always would
with everything that happened Richard proposed one last time, Emma was driving I her car knocking of the front door of the man she loved who wouldn't it be Richard who everyone in her life bar Monique loved or the stranger that saved her life and was leaving in a few days.
I was so happy when she pick Jack he was meant for him and she for him its strange how a random and cruel accident can bring the two most perfect people for each other together I guess it was fate.

Emma told Jack Richard proposed but he was the guy for her she loved him, that now her mother had the right care she wanted to leave with him and go to the states. Jack new she couldn't be apart from her family so had bought the cottage they had spent their first night together in, he suggested they split their time between both homes, he gave her a ring not an engagement but a ring to say one day we will he wanted to wake up every morning with her though he was scared of commitment before he wasn't with her she was the one he had been looking for but never thought he would find.

At the beginning of every other chapter there's a Minnie story I thought it was leading to Emma and Jacks wedding but no it was forty years ahead and it was Jacks funeral she was getting ready for Jack was 76 Emma 67  they had so many beautiful years together 2 sons 1 daughter and many adventures. Jack was always the one who never wanted commitment but over the years the happy years they spent together he proposed 12 times every time Emma saying this wasn't the right moment and try again. they never did get married the roles reversed Emma new they were always going to be together so what was the point in a piece of paper their anniversary was the date he gave her a non engagement ring. the night that they met when he was saving her life he said as they were climbing up the embankment don't worry I'm right behind you it was poignant for those to be Emma's final words Emma's final words are "our story isn't over yet, I'll be right behind you."


This book pulled at my heart strings, I was hoping and praying Emma would pick Jack and not Richard because we all do things to make others happy instead of our selves when we should do what makes us happy after all we only have one life. it would be amazing to find my guy that I will spend 40 years creating memories having adventures with growing more in love as each day passes.
its such a beautiful read I didn't want it to end and say goodbye to the characters.

Book Review:Paper Towns By John Green

I had such high expectations of paper towns after reading The fault in our stars, which broke my heart, was uplifting at the same time so I ran out and bought as many of John Green books as I could.

I new that they were turning paper towns in to a film so wanted to read it before it came out, I just hoped I wasn't disappointed and I wasn't.

Paper towns is very different to The fault in our starts, It's not a tear jerking rip your heart out kind of book its mysterious, comical the only thing it has in common with the fault in our stars it makes you see things in a different way John Green is really good at that, it gets you to think see things in a way you didn't before and you become a better and understand person after reading it.

The book is about Quentin and Margo they live in a the same street in Orlando Florida since they were two, when they are nine they find a dead body in the local park, Margo is intrigued wanting to know how and why he died where as Q is scared wants to get out of their and wish he hadn't seen the dead body.

Margo investigate what happened, It turns out it was a man called Robert he lived close to them the neighbour said his last string broke when his wife left him so he killed himself.

The book then skips to when they are 18 they are in their last few weeks of high school, they are no longer in the same circle of friends, Q is just one of the regular students not a geek just a normal guy  has two best friends called Ben and Radar who are in band, where as Margo is the most popular girl in school lives for adventure and goes days at a time and comes back with crazy stories.

One night out of the blew Margo turns up at Q's window at 12am like she once did when they were 9, he was surprised but had been in love with her ever since he could remember. She had found out her football BF had cheated on her with her best friend so she had a plan of pay back so they new they had hurt her and wanted Q to come along for the ride

They put fish in her BFF car, put hair removal cream on her BF eyebrow one of her Friends parents court them and nearly shot them but they managed to get away. One of the last things they did was go to the Suntrust building to see all of Orlando and see the houses that they had just been too. Margo said it was like a paper town fake, superficial and only 2 dimensional she thought that people just did things finish school go to university get married have babies etc and nothing changed they lived these mundane lives where nothing changed and she didn't like that that's why brought Q on this adventure so one day he could say I had an adventure but she also missed him and regretted not spending more time with him instead of her fake friends.

They later broke in to Sea world Margo loved the planning of the ventures not so much the actual doing of the adventures.
Q was up set with Margo when she was saying everything she had done for him that night then said “I didn’t need you, You idiot. I picked you. And then you picked me back." that is my favourite line in the book. She missed his friendship all these years she had stopped the cool kids picking on him all these years that shows she cared about him. Through the book I felt Margo has a lot of regret I wondered if  Margo had never become one of the popular people because of her looks which she found silly would she still want  to leave if she had stayed with Q all these years and he got to see the real her all these years but you can never go back.
They both went their separate ways Q hoping they would be friends again and she'd hang out with him in school instead of her horrible friends but the next day at school she didn't turn up and had gone missing again nothing new for Margo so people weren't that worried but Q was.

He realised like before she had left clues of where she would be, he was worried that she may have killed herself with what she had been saying that he last string broke when finishing out her BF had cheated on her and that reminded him of when Robert killed himself when his last string broke so frantically looked for the clues to see where she would be.

Q got his friends Ben and Radar to help him Ben was a little self absorbed which irritated Q but he helped him like friends do as radar got Q to see that though Ben was self absorbed he was a good guy he was a good friend most of the time and that yes he had a floor but so did he too he was obsessed with Margo but they still liked him as a friend. It was really nice to see the 3 guys relationship you never really get to see that in many books they had a good dynamic between them from funny comments of Ben and his honey bunnies and radar being thoughtful and insightful he was lucky to have friend like them.

Margo's friend Lacey who she thought didn't let her about the BF cheating when she actually didn't know was worried so helped them look for her and funnily ended up dating the band guy Ben he finally found his honey bunny and she found him funny.

They went from clue to clue finding address for abandoned buildings, posters being stuck on the back of Margo's blind in her room to poems with highlighted sentences trying to piece each clue together so Q could get to Margo.

The morning of graduation it all pieced together the gang go together missing their graduation and set of on a road trip to Agloe near new your city which was a fake place that the inventors of the map made up but it then turned into an actual place when people kept going there and then built a general store there, they only had 21 hours to find her before he would leave they had an eventful trip there but they finally found her.

She was in an abandoned building though she had left clues for Q she had left them last minutes as she was planning on leaving after graduation but with her BF cheating on her she left last minute no longer being able to take being there any longer though she wanted to be with Q to spend more time with him. With her leaving last minute her clues weren't great and though she wanted Q to find them she wasn't expecting her to find her they were for him to have fun and no she's OK but she was glad he found her she missed him.

When Margo and Q found Robert when they were 9 she started to write a story where Q was her superhero the boy she had a crush on and her talking dog after their adventure of paying back her friends she realised he was that guy she wrote about and she liked him too.

Though Margo previously said that Orlando was a paper town she meant she was, she had made herself to be what others wanted of her this cool girl but people didn't know the real her that what's this books about. Q had this version of her from when they were 9 though he loved the idea of her he didn't know her and along the way he started to actually know Margo a 18 year old girl who wasn't happy with her life who had been making this plan for years to leave so she can start over and be the real her. He saw her cracks no long seeing her through a perfect window and seeing her cracks made him love her more as now he was seeing the real Margo. My other favourite line in the book was “When did we see each other face-to-face? Not until you saw into my cracks and I saw into yours. Before that, we were just looking at ideas of each other, like looking at your window shade but never seeing inside. But once the vessel cracks, the light can get in. The light can get out.”

Q really wanted to kisses her but knowing it couldn't go any where he stopped himself but later gave in when it was the right moment, she kissed him back she was planning on going to New York to start over she wanted Q to go with her, she new he wouldn't he had his life set for him university work family etc but I think though he did have that in his future she changed him she opened his eyes up he became confident and had done things he would never thought he could do she changed him for the better.

They buried the book that Margo had written her story of her and Q in and had over the years written her plans for her big adventure in, they were saying good bye to their 9 year old selves and starting a fresh.  
It was time for Q to leave they held each other they kissed, Q was happy that he finally got to know the girl he loved for so long though she wasn't what he thought she was he loved finding out who the real Margo was the Margo that wasn't perfect that she had cracks and they promised to stay in touch.

I really loved John Green's message in this book with what Q learnt about friendship that you may not like aspects of your friends as they may not like aspects of you either but they and you can still be great friends give them a little slack.

Kind of like friends I have sometimes I may not peak to the a lot or they maybe a but about them selves but when ever I need them like Q needed his they are always there.

With Margo and Q's relationship he loved this idea of her this imagine he had made of her from knowing her as a child but that image wasn't the person he thought she was he saw the real her, her flaws and he still loved her without letting others see you flaws they Will never no the real you.
By letting those around you see your cracks it lets the light in making living a less dark place.

If you have read it what did you think of it?

Peanut xx

Book Review: The Best Of Me

As teenagers they were so in love but now they were adults with complicated lives but once they came together they new that their love for each other had never gone away.
Dawson had never found anyone since Amanda because he didn't want anyone but her, she had married and had 4 children though she loved her husband she new that it wasn't real love, the love like she felt for Dawson.

Finally meeting they thought by chance 20 years later they new their love was still there, they had a weekend together both wanting to be together but knowing that Amanad's life wasn't so simple to walk away from though she new she should and so wanted to be with Dawson.

The weekend finished they did what they need to do for Tuck they scattered his ashes at the cottage he and his wife had together, happy that Tuck and Clara his wife were now together again. Tuck new life was short and wanted them to either get back together or move on from each other as he new they both weren't happy.
Tuck had been living life after Clara's death with her ghost and he didn't want Amanda to live with the ghost of Dawson for the rest of her life when she could have the real thing and be happy.

Amanda made the decision to stay with her husband but not because she love him but because of her children. Amanda is on her way home when she gets a call from her son saying that he and her husband have been in a car accident her son ends up needing a heart transplant obviously she his heart broken just willing her son to be OK..

The whole time Dawson is in oriental he is trying to stay away from his crazy cousins his family where known in the town as crazy criminals his dad had passed away so there was noone to control his cousins one night he had been in town his cousin ted tried to kill him but had got away and ted was pretty banged u and wanting revenge.
Dawson leaves oriental wanting to be with Amanda wishing he made her stay but he knew he couldn't no matter what he wanted.
 He realises he has left the last letter tuck has given him at tucks house so goes back but he knows that his cousins are still out for blood.

An incident leads Dawson to follow this man to help a person he once new his cousins were beating up a man in a local pub Dawson comes to the rescue and get shot in the head and his declared brain dead. I could see this coming and wishing it wasn't going to happen you wish for these two to have their happy ending.

Amanda's prayers are answered when her son gets the heart he needs, he finds it hard to come to terms with when he first comes round but eventually he is thankful for the second chance he has got.
Amanda gets a call a while later and is told of his death her heart is ripped out the boy now the man she loved was no longer here she has lost the love of her life.

Two years later Amanda is still with her husband still not in love with him just not wanting to ruin her family, her son wants to send a letter to the donor of the hearts family all he new was that the man was 42 years old. when Amanda got the call about Dawson's death she new that he had been the donor of her sons heart. The love of her life's heart was now keeping her son alive the man who once said "I gave you the best of me" now he really had, she hugged her son hearing and feeling Dawson's heart beating on her chest and said she loved him.

When I first got this book I was expecting it to have a happy ending for Dawson and Amanda to get to finally be together as they were meant to be. That after all this time that their love story was cut short you wanted them to have their happy ending. Instead Amanda just couldn't leave her family I just wanted to shake her and say be with Dawson he loves you, you love him stop being so silly yes its complicated but that life it will work out in the end and you and Dawson can grow old together.

Amanda wonder if it was a love that could last a mundane life would daswon still see he as this beautiful creature, he could he had no question that he wanted to wake up with her have dinner with her and her children the normal things she would always be special to him. Amanda new it could work but was scared she wanted to wake up to him in the morning sit and watch him fix cars as they were the only ones who really got each other they new each other it was a special love which makes it sadder that Amanda had to

As soon as you read that her son is needed a heart transplant you no Dawson is going to be a the donor I was crying hoping this wasn't going to be true but sadly it is, though its so heart wrenching that they cant be together you no they will be again one day they found each other twice in life I'm sure they will in death.

The book makes you think of you own what ifs if you chose different things done different things but life is to short to make the wrong decision do what your heart wants then you can never go wrong its better than looking back when you 40 thinking what if?

From this book you get follow your heart, don't waste time being with some one your not in love with though it maybe complicated its better to be with someone you love than live with their ghost of what might of been for the rest of your life.


Peanut xx

Book Review: Lucy In The Sky By Paige Toon

This story has many twists and turns it keeps you gripped I couldn't put it down I just wanted to find out what was going to happen next. your drawn into the story by the like able and relate able character Lucy she's heading to Australia where she lived from ages 3-16 to see her best friends Sam and molly who are getting married when on getting on the plane she gets a text saying her boyfriend James of 4 years has cheated on her,he denies  it but she doesn't no what to believe but is determined to enjoy her stay as she hasn't been back home in 9 years and wants to be happy with her best friends.
she arrives in OZ and sees Sam's younger brother Nathan he's 23 2 years younger than Sam , molly and Lucy he's no longer a little kid he's a man and oh how she has noticed she gets butterflies and she cant stop thinking about him.

Lucy and Nathan connect he gets her she gets him its not like that with James she is heart broken to leave Sydney to go back to James not really knowing if he's cheated or not she's never really trusted him he's always told white lies.

Nathan comes to London to work on a building site this makes Lucy happy, she tried to spend time with him in the 3 months he's there for here heart telling her one thing he's the one for her but her head says but James is the stable one.
all the way through I cant wait for Nathan to come in to the story he's a laid back guy not complicated and is a good guy where James is just well not a likable guy you no when you get a feeling about a character well I got that with him couldn't trust him as far as I could throw him.

There are so many twist with this story you never no where its going to go, its real heart breaking and you can see your self in the characters shoes which makes you believe the story. its more than a girl loves two guys kind of book you root for the good guy but will he win out and get the girl? do you follow your head or your heart? will it be safe and secure or a leap of faith and heart?

This is a must read if you do read it let me no what you think do you get a feeling about James too?

Peanut xx

Book Review: Me Before You By Jojo Moyes

This is a tremendously heart wrenching, eye opening book that is a must read. The book follows two characters Will Traynor who had this amazing life he was a lawyer, loved adventures and throwing himself out of and off of things, traveller, ladies man he loved his life.
Will gets hit by a motor bike on his way to work and that's where Louisa comes into it two years later she's employed to perk Will up with her chatty personality and wacky out their fashion choices.
In all of Louisa  Clark 26 years she hadn't left here little town and hasn't got any ambition to, she doesn't no what she wanted from life and never really gave it a thought until she meet will.

At first Will tested her wondering if she was going to stick around he had been through may of helpers, Will hated it he hated that his choices had been taken away from him, he hated his life and had previously tried to take his own life, Louisa saw the scars awhile into caring for him. Mrs Traynor was scary hard faced didn't like Louisa but she wanted Louisa to show him he could have a full life and that there was still a point to life though it wasn't the life he new Louisa came up with a plan to get him to do many activities holidays to make him want to live.

For two people who came together from a not normal situation and from different backgrounds they found a connection they got each other they pushed each other to see things in a different way. Louisa didn't see wills chair she saw Will the man the funny, rude, smart man who just happened to be in a chair. Louisa had hidden her self away all her life helping her parents, her sister and her nephew she never thought of the future but Will pushed her to try new things that she thought weren't her like going to hear a classical music which she sobbed at the emotions it made her feel that she didn't think was possible. Louisa had closed her self off to the possibilities that her life could be and Will made her see the amazing, beautiful, smart, strong person she was they saw each other the way the other couldn't see and got each other.

The book gets you to see both views from those who can live a full life after that kind of injury, those who don't feel their lives are full as they cant be the person they want to be. Will was such an adventure yes he could do some of those things but he was also living a life in constant pain in and out of hospital having no control of his life and the fear what his life maybe like weeks, months, years down the line it was the scary true for him he was only going to get worse.
Then from their loved ones you don't want to loss your child, brother, love of your life you want them to see the good things that their life can be better. Louisa showed that to will he started to smile he found someone that saw him even though he thought he was broken and not the man he used to be he said himself he was an arse before she saw the will she had only known and she loved him and she brought part of him back to life.

These two characters would never of met if it weren't for Wills accident, though he wishes he had his old life back I think he's glad it happened otherwise he would never of met Louisa found someone that could love him even though broken and not the man he wished he would be. though Will  was this adventurous guy, a ball breaker in law he never found  true love and Clark gave him that though he said she didn't really no him this wasn't the man he was this chair Clark saw a side of him he couldn't see him self and the same for her Will saw her a way she didn't see herself I think the biggest adventure Will had was being able to show  Clark that there is a whole world out there for her and that she can dream, try new things and she is the type of person to live that gave him the most satisfaction

It is such a great topic for a book, its relevant to now with those wanting to change the laws to be able to kill themselves without their loved ones being prosecuted. I am for this though I saw Louisa side of wanting to keep  the man she loved from killing himself. though I would want to do the same. if I were Will being an active person I wouldn't want to rely on others,  not to be able to get up and dance not to have a full life that I would want to live. the book shows the story from different sides and gets you thinking what if it were you or your loved one.

The over all message I got from the book was we have one life live don't exist be bold in life whether its doing something you didn't think you could do, go scuba diving, do something that your scared of step out of your box because yes it will be scary but you don't no you might just wish you don't it before.

NOW GO LIVE  oh and read the book its amazing :)

Peanut xx

Welcome

Welcome all thank you for stopping by, I have started this blog as in the last year i have fallen in love with books, I wasn't much of a book enthusiast growing up in fact I hated them. I hated the embarrassment I got when I had to read out loud in school and it turned me off reading completely. I thought it was a chore and couldn't imagine why people would sit for hours just reading a boring book why wouldn't you just watch a movie instead? oh how I was wrong.

By accident I randomly picked up a book I had builders in the house my battery had died on my laptop, I had no electric to charge it, then I gravitated to a book that was on top of the cabinet and once I started I couldn't put it down.

 It was such a thought provoking, intriguing, opened up my mind to another culture background and gave me feeling and thought I didn't think I would have reading a book.
 I have always been more of a visual person, not anymore books have opened another world up to me I see a book shelf and I'm drawn like a magnet to the next character I can fall in love with, my next  adventure I can have through the pages.

 My views on life changed words are an amazing tool they can make you fell, think see things in a different way, ever since that first random encounter of a book last year I thank my lucky stars i had no electric, as I would never of found a new love and for books of all things :)

I hope you enjoy my reviews if you would like to recommend me anything I would gladly like to read it

Peanut (Laura) xx